Posted by: kerrywills | October 22, 2010

My dream job: The conference call guy

I have probably dialed into hundreds of conference calls and I always enjoy the professional speaker who guides me through the dial-in process. I think this would be my dream job, although I would probably do it more like a Michael Buffer boxing match to liven things up. I would allow users to select such options as…

  • “Lllllllllllllettttttttttttttts get ready to have a conference”
  • “This bout is scheduled for 30 minutes or professional knockout”
  • “Who let the host out…who…who….who”

"Llllllllllllllllleeeetttttttttts get ready to collaborate!"

Or give instructions to really help people…

  • “If you need help dialing, dont’ press anything as you do not deserve to use electronic communications”
  • “To mute your line, stop talking”

Or even call out bad phone etiquette…

  • “Will the person with the dog barking or kid crying please leave the call”
  • “You are not on mute and we all hear you”
  • “Who put the entire line on hold causing us to talk over this crappy music”
  • “Nice move, guy who is going to the bathroom during the meeting”
  • “Seriously, you don’t need the phone so close to your mouth that we can hear you breathing”

Now that would be fun. If you agree, press 1.


  1. My home phone’s mute button broke during a conference call, enabling all parties to hear the landscaper cut down the massive oak in my yard.

  2. Then there are all the people “live in the room” at the other end of the call who don’t seem to realize they have to speak up or the multitudes on the line won’t be able to hear them.

  3. […] Conference calls […]

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